Friday, October 31, 2008

Try Amish-ness

Ed is a friend.  I'd be lying if I said we were close.  See Ed and I have a give/take relationship.  Ed takes my life force and doesn't give a shit until I stop giving.
Yea fortune!!  Ed has had some luck (I can't say if it was good or bad).  Let us say he won a big screen TV.  He never watched much TV but had dreams of an HD set in a huge house in Aspen with a football as big as his head.  Ed never had the ambition to actually accomplish this but the dream was a good one and the delusion was enough to entertain anyone who would listen.  Alas, I am the only one who listens because I think every human has value.
So, Ed wins the TV but it falls off the hood of his 1977 Mercury Comet on the way home.  It was no person's fault.  It just happened.  Call it an act of God.
On one hand, "damn!" On the other, "oh well, it was free and it was never really mine".
A few weeks later Ed is showing the signs of loss and grief.  Ed doesn't know this.  He figures that if he doesn't watch TV ever again he won't miss what he never had.  He knows where he was going to put it and how he would hook up his X-box and how cool 'Transformers' would look on it.  But no.  No more TV for Ed for has no outward remorse or sense of loss therefore it never happened.
I want to smack Ed in the teeth with a vacuum cleaner and tell him if he doesn't cry and work through this I'll have to beat his (choose an ethnic skin color) ass until he has a good cry.

Wish me luck and pray for Ed's emotionally constipated heart.

NOTE: It is important to know that Ed doesn't exist.  Someone on this earth shares some parts of his personality.  The rest was made up and embellished so I could work through this complicated emotional obstacle course.  I also made up the TV and the Comet, I did not make up God.

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Cheers to POTUS

Thanks to this nifty inter-thingy-web I was able to find out that bars are open on election day.

My schedule isn't massively busy but when I have to put bar time on the calendar and that only free night is questionable if 'The Crossing" will be open I get a little sweaty.  Luckily I can check on this information from the confines of home and not look like a complete booze-hound as I go from pub-to-pub knocking desperately seeking a Guinness.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Inaction is action

Today is BLOG action day.  That means everyone with a BLOG is supposed to talk about the same societal problem so water cooler leaches everywhere say things like, "Dude I read this awesome BLOG about poverty and how bad it is.  I'm totally doing something about that." Thus inspiring a nation, nay a world, to solve the problem so comments can mature into, "Dude, remember that time we solved poverty?...that was awesome."

I'm sure the last thing on most BLOGgers mind was action.  I'm betting they were hoping to get rich by posting their opinions.  The most action involved is lifting the pinky to hit .   So here is to the impoverished (who won't be able to read this message).  Come on folks; stop reading so we can make poverty like so '90s.

Friday, October 10, 2008

Sing-a-long. Or is it alone?

I have a predictable pattern of behavior.  I don't want to call it a habit because then I would have to "get help".

On Friday nights I have a drink or three and listen to music.  Usually the wife is here to share this as we solve the problems of our world and fall in love again.  Tonight she is traveling home so you guys are the lucky audience.  Now if you are my cousin you are feeling a little betrayed right now because I just sent a variation of this message to you (but I sent it to you 1st).  I also tips-e-mail, which is like drunk dialing, but again, I don't have a problem (honestly Dee, this is not a cry for help rather a simple bout of humor, seriously).  

This week's musical horizon expander is:  'You Gotta Go' by Chase the Sun.  A nice blues song that will make you want that loved one gone or elate you because you don't have this problem.

Monday, October 06, 2008

He is learning

8 just told me that he could wreck his covers in one night and,  "That is how I roll for some reason."

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